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Stop Hoarding Your Success

If you're in the funeral industry, especially if you're a minority owned independent firm, this is a call to action for you. If you want to stay in business, read this now.

When I first started my company, I was starting over after failing at my first business. This time I knew the formula, how to do it right and it was slowly gaining steam. Part of the formula was gaining more exposure. I did this with a small credit line and contact information at the bottom of the keepsakes I designed. The firm got the larger credit line naturally since they were the source. They got paid for referring me too. They loved it and it still works to this day. I also knew that other funeral attendees were going to see the amazing designs I created and want it for their loved ones. It also underscores the business philosophy that when design has an integral part of business development the brand grows stronger and can sell on its own. One of the black-owned firms I dealt with in my early days didn’t like my model, but loved my designs. I understood his feelings until I didn’t. His feelings highlighted a flaw that our culture has experienced for too long than we care to admit.

Sign #1: The Lopsided Flaw

During my pitch he highlighted my business “flaw”. Other families who need the keepsakes will come to me directly rather than coming to him and he wanted to control both the dynamic of dealing with the families and the lion’s share of the keepsake revenue. I knew that this would happen and I had a solution that would allow us to both to win. It was simple, if you send more keepsakes orders my way I’ll remove the credit line and do you one better; I’ll give you wholesale pricing so you can make even more. However my business model was flawed. If you make thousands off the service and that is your expertise, why can’t I make I what I need to off my expertise which is significantly smaller in comparison? I understand the concept of money in your pocket is better than money in someone else’s, but there has to be balance. That was the beginning of the end.

Sign #2: He Didn’t Put A Ring On It

He wanted lower pricing. Yes, this was my model at the time, however he refused to commit to providing more volume in return as we agreed. Mind you, we knew each other for some time when he was working at another firm before he went out on his own. I did a great job designing both keepsakes and marketing collateral for that firm and it helped them to grow. So he knew I did good work and wanted the same results for himself since he was just starting. In essence, he valued what my service brought to the table for his firm. However, he didn’t really value it because he didn’t want to pay what I charged, which was my value. One could argue he was being a savvy businessman. No. He was being cheap and shady. You’ll see why.

Sign #3: All For You None For Me

Months later he was attending an expo that helped local parishioners know the funeral homes who will help their loved ones onto the next stage. It was open to industry professionals. He came to me to design the signage for his booth. I was so focused on winning the temporary business of this project that I completely overlooked the obvious. Why shouldn’t I be there as well? What’s more, why isn’t he suggesting to me that I should reach out to the event overseers, since I wasn’t thinking it? My concept of marketing to both firms and families directly was new for this area, so I should have been there. It would have been huge for me since the attendees were all my secondary target audience. I mean, he knew I was young and what position I was in. I wasn’t a threat to him, yet he was treating me as such, intentional or not. At the end of the day we had a shared target.

What’s happened is that as some have achieved that level of excellence those with more resources at their disposal have taken our excellence and fast tracked their own success. As a result we stay secretive. We hide our talents and skills. We do jobs that we know we shouldn’t be doing because we’re licking our wounds rather than truly healing them. But that still doesn‘t change the cost.

Keyword is shared. I’m not a funeral director. We don’t fight each other to win business, if one wins the other does because of our good relationship. However, he argued that was my price was too high, and actually didn’t pay the balance. Now I’ll be honest and say that part of it was my fault; I own my mistakes. There was a quality control issue that I didn’t fully train my staffer on. So I told him he didn’t have to pay the balance, apologized and made it right. But here’s the crazy part. Even with our mistake our designs still brought him tons of new business. In fact, to this day, I can walk into his place and see the signage I created. If he had such an issue with my quality why still have it up? At this point I couldn’t look at him the same anymore.

The Breaking Point: You Need the Product But Won’t Pay the Price

My business is growing and I’m seeing what healthy business relationships look like. These are the ones where both parties win and win big. These are the ones where it’s refreshing to parlay off each others’ skills and knowledge to grow. I could see this was not the case with the above firm. His calls were met with hesitation. My staff didn’t want to make deliveries to his place, I had to. The negativity of his business practices were taking a toll on my business. Now, there’s a level of truth in the saying that you don’t have to like the person to do business with them. The reality of that statement is more like you don’t like certain qualities of some of your family members, but you still enjoy their company. This was not the case here. In business you have to know, like and trust someone to give them your business. He was only one of those three. Because I knew how he was I didn’t like the experience of doing business with him and I certainly didn’t trust him. The breaking point came when he was in a pinch and needed my rush services because no one else could do it with the quality he needed in the time frame he needed it in. Yes we can do it, but there are fees associated with a rush service. He needed it, didn’t want to pay my fees and actually wanted to pay less than the normal rate.

Say Hello to Relief

I asked one of my clients before if they were scared of the backlash that comes from firing someone? He said no way! He said by the time he gets around to firing them it’s a relief. He no longer has to deal with the stress they caused him and burden they placed on the team. I could see his words coming true here. We’re both in the same boat, just starting out. So, everything is all for you and scrapes for me? Sign #1. You want the lowest price possible for quality you can’t produce on your own, but don’t want to reciprocate by sending more business my way? Sign #2. The work produces results for you, but you don’t want to share your success with others so everyone can benefit, most importantly the communities we both serve? Sign #3. On top of that your families and staff tell me how much they love what I do for them but you have problems with my pricing? Breaking point. For years I accepted this as part of the cost of doing business until that breaking point came and I fired him as a client. But he’s not alone and that’s the scary part.

There are so many African-American owned firms out there that are so secretive about their success that they stay hermits. While at the same time dozens of firms that have been around for generations are closing their doors. We argue that no one takes us seriously when the reality is that many of us don’t have businesses that force people to take us seriously. On top of this, we expect others to give us hand-outs and hook-ups just because we share the same ethnicity and then flake out when it comes time to reciprocate. No wonder we are where we are.

Now, I’m not negating our history. As long as we live in America we will always have the chips stacked against us. Systematic racism and oppression is an argument that has only two solutions—excellence and sharing. Excellence is the cost of being Black in America. You have to be the best, or at least one of the best, for people to take you seriously and pay you what your worth. What’s happened is that as some have achieved that level of excellence those with more resources at their disposal have taken our excellence and fast tracked their own success. As a result we stay secretive. We hide our talents and skills. We take jobs that we know we shouldn’t be doing because we’re licking our wounds rather than truly healing them. But that still doesn‘t change the cost. Even though this is the dynamic we have a plethora of examples, past and present, of those that have risen above it and achieved success some of us will never achieve. That is until we do what they did—share.

That’s the formula for success today. Share your success. Share your process. Share, share, share. There are so many companies out there today that are growing by leaps and bounds because they share. I know one business that literally makes $11,000 a day all because they share everything and they have literally changed their industry for the better, permanently. However this begs the question.

“If You’re Giving Away Your Knowledge and Expertise Won’t That Push You Out of Business?”

If your drive is to better yourself you never have to worry about going out of business. If you are your own competition then you constantly seek to better yourself, your business and those around you. By the time someone has taken and applied your knowledge to their business you’ll be light years ahead of them. There was a scene in Dragon, The Bruce Lee Story where the brother of a man he’s beaten has sworn to kill him. He said to Bruce, that he’s read his book and knows all his moves, but he still got whooped. Why? Bruce had a never-ending drive for excellence. By the time the brother approached him he was way beyond his core teachings.

“Won’t Someone Steal My Ideas?”

Yes they will. I’m not gonna lie about that. I had firms tell me to my face that they could duplicate my designs and that they don’t need me. Then they ask to hold onto a sample. I’ve gone to services seeing my designs copied. There’s probably copies of my stuff out there that I don’t even know of. One of my clients had this amazing idea for a business, we collaborated together and it was a hit. Then it was copied. He stopped production soon after because he felt he was too small to compete with the bigger companies that copied his ideas. He didn’t bring in more staff because he felt they couldn’t do what he could. Rather than share his knowledge and train a team to be more like him out there and grow, his idea died. He’s still does business in another fashion, but some of the clients who benefited from the exposure went out of business. There will always be people who copy what you do. Take it as a compliment. If you see them get something you always wanted as a result of your hard work, push yourself harder and learn from it. But never let it hold you back.

The Upside of Sharing

When you share not only do you help others, you intentionally guilt them into helping you. They’re getting all this amazing knowledge and assistance for free or next to nothing. They’ve leveraged your knowledge to shorten their learning curve. As a result they’re so appreciative that they become your brand ambassadors preaching about you to everyone everywhere. That leads to sales. 

The other upside to sharing is that there will be some that see the value in your expertise. They have a problem and don’t have the time to solve it themselves. What they do have is deep pockets to pay someone to solve it for them. That person is you. We all hate arguing over price. Anyone who comes to you to solve their problem values and validates your expertise. When that happens you never have to argue over price again or they can take a hike.

What Does All This Mean?

Very few of us are taken seriously. In some cases it’s valid. However, if you want to change the dynamic get rid of the old mentality of keeping things to yourselves. Strive for excellence and seek sources where you can share your excellence with others. It will come back to you in time. Even it didn’t, although it will, you’re that much better for it and can apply it somewhere else that will work for you. This magazine strives for excellence, which is why I’m writing for it. I’m inviting you to rise up and pool your excellence with others in this industry. Hold each other accountable. Motivate each other. Enlighten them with the tools they need to reach where you are as you reach higher. When everyone continues to achieve higher levels of excellence we will have something that will make others take our culture seriously.  

Bio

George Paul III is a branding expert and award-winning designer. He’s the Founder of Cherished Keepsakes, a creative agency that passionately honors legacies of both firms and families. This is accomplished through their branding, strategy and design services. Further, they honor the legacy of loved ones through their amazingly designed funeral products such as programs, prayer cards, buttons, bookmarks, photo collages and more. George provides branding and business advice through his blog, Seize the Brand, an education platform designed to empower business owners by leveraging the power of branding to realize business and life goals. More resources available at www.cherishedkps.com and www.seizethebrand.com

Originally published in The Source Magazine published by The National Funeral Director and Morticians Association, Spring 2019 Issue

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