Many of us never want to be a burden on others. Thus we keep things to ourselves and perhaps suffer in silence. Sometimes that sentiment carries over into our passing. We say, “You don’t have to do anything. Just cremate me. I don’t want a service.” Naturally, our loved ones will respect your wishes, but in doing so you could unwittingly become a burden on your loved ones. How so? Read this article till the end and learn more about Burial insurance.
Why is a Memorial service so important?
The memorial service is not just for you. It’s a way for your loved ones to get closure. It’s also a way for them to show honor to you and the legacy you’re leaving behind. Think of the families who haven’t had a chance to lay their loved ones to rest. Ones where they’ve disappeared, been abducted, are missing in action or can’t be found because of mysterious circumstances. These families go for years not being able to properly deal with their grief because they don’t have an answer as to where their loved one is and what’s happened to them. Are they alive, injured, unable to get help, etc.? Their minds just wander and it’s unbearable for them.
Now, imagine someone approached their door, the bearer of bad news.
“Ma’am, we’ve found your loved one and they’ve passed away. I’m sorry for your loss.”
Naturally, they’re devasted, but there’s also a bit of relief. They’re thinking to themselves, “I know what’s happened. I can finally make arrangements. I can send them off properly.” As you see the memorial service gives them a chance at closure. To let out all those bottled-up feelings, finally, begin healing and no longer live in a state of uncertainty. Those sentiments carry over into most funeral services regardless of the circumstances surrounding the loss.
What is the need for Burial insurance for a memorial service?
We may, with good intention, tell our families that they don’t have to do much or anything at all since we know funerals are expensive. However, we shouldn’t deny them the opportunity to hold a memorial service since it heals them and helps bring closure. I’m not alone in understanding the power of having a memorial service. There was a consumer survey conducted by the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA) and published in the September 2021 issue of The Director Magazine. In that survey, they said respondents felt that attending a memorial service with burial was more helpful in the healing process and honoring their loved ones than a cremation service. On top of that 81% of people surveyed had some kind of memorial service. What does this mean?
We may feel that we don’t want service so as not to be a burden, however, our survivors WANT to pay tribute to all you’ve done for them and others. Having a memorial service gives them the opportunity to do so. Don’t deny them the chance at healing. If you are concerned about cost so as not to be a burden here are some options you can pick from that will allow your survivors to handle your arrangements with dignity and focus on honoring your legacy rather than wondering how they’re going to pay for the service.
What are some Financial aids for a Memorial service?
There are numerous financial aids available for organizing a memorial service for your loved ones. To list a few of them:-
- Burial Insurance
- At need insurance policies
- Cremation with a service
- Funding campaigns
Let us now discuss these.
Also read: How keepsakes can bring peace to bereaved families?
Life or Burial Insurance
This is the easiest and I believe the most cathartic way to be laid to rest. This is because the insurance policy takes costs off the table and allows everyone to focus on honoring your legacy. It can be a large life insurance policy to finalize your affairs and set your family up for life without you. Or it could be a burial policy that just covers the cost of laying you to rest. Now your family doesn’t have to spend every penny in that final expense policy on your service, but it does keep the cost of laying you to rest from being an unexpected heavy burden.
You can talk to an insurance company about getting a life insurance policy and you can talk to your local funeral home about getting a preneed burial policy to cover the cost of your arrangements.
At Need Insurance Policies
If your loved one did not have a burial insurance policy you can apply for funding for funeral arrangements. This would be a financing plan to cover the costs of burial only. There are companies that provide financing to families directly or through your local funeral home. Nonetheless, the purpose is to help ease the impact of having to shell out thousands you weren’t expecting at once while giving you the ability to pay it off over time. Thus again, you can focus on honoring their legacy and healing rather than compounding it with feelings of regret because you couldn’t give them the send-off they deserved.
Cremation with a service
Cremation is always going to be the less expensive option than a traditional burial. One is not greater than the other. In fact, the cost is usually not a major factor when a family chooses to cremate their loved one. There are so many options in this regard that I don’t want to suggest one over the other. I will mention this to protect you, and that is to be wary of online companies that offer to handle all the arrangements for you online at a super cheap cost. Make sure they are legit businesses with a local presence because online brokers are not regulated by the government the way funeral homes are and it could put you in a situation that will leave you feeling worse rather than healed.
The main point is that if you go the cremation route make sure you’re holding some kind of memorial service with the help of funeral keepsakes such as memorial bookmarks or funeral prayer cards so that everyone has a chance to pay their last respects because, in truth, they want to. It can be held at the Funeral Home, a church, a banquet hall or even a private residence. For more information about Online Cremation Providers listen to episode 360 of the Undertaking the Podcast. To look into cremation options you can also check with your local funeral home or local cremation specialist.
GoFundMe Campaigns
Now I’m going, to be honest, and say that this is my least favourite option, but I wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t list it as an option. On the one hand, there’s a lot of bad press and stigmas surrounding this form of paying for funeral arrangements. I see it from multiple viewpoints. From the funeral home, it makes the interaction and arrangements difficult because money is being held up with no strong guarantee the entire cost will be covered. While this uncertainty is taking place they’re the professionals who are putting their best foot forward providing your top-notch service in good faith. Then there’s the double-edged stigma from family and supporters. They can see you’ve launched a GoFundMe campaign and view it with unspoken disdain perhaps seeing it as begging, crass or tacky because “you’re asking us to pay for a service you should’ve made plans for or cover yourself.”
This doesn’t take into consideration the unexpected nature of death or even surrounding causes that put people in situations they weren’t expecting. Plus you never want to disenfranchise their grief by making them feel their form of laying their loved one to rest doesn’t measure up to society’s standards. This is because there are also those that genuinely want to help and donating to cover the cost of the service is their way of paying their respects and honoring a legacy that’s touched them personally.
Thus, if you choose this option be prepared for all of these sentiments. The negative ones I doubt will actually be expressed verbally but may manifest themselves in other forms down the road. You’re laying your loved one to rest the best way you can and those that want to support you in that way will, but never force them to support you a specific way since everyone grieves and offers condolences in their own way.
No matter when it comes none of us is ever truly prepared for death. However, we can do our part to lessen the burden of being laid to rest by making the cost associated with our death a non-factor and giving our survivors the chance to honor our legacy and heal by having a memorial service.
