Many families that come to cherished keepsakes are first-timers in the sense that this is their first time planning and taking the lead in gathering things for the funeral service. Because of that they’re overwhelmed and feel like a deer in headlights. If this is you take a moment and take a deep breath. You have a lot on your plate and it’s completely understandable if you’re wondering where to start.
One of the best things to do is to delegate tasks because you can’t do it all by yourself. Many may offer to help and accept tasks from you, but you need to follow up in a timely manner to make sure they haven’t dropped the ball. I’ve had many families that have first come to me about having funeral programs or prayer cards done for the service. I don’t hear from them in a day or two and I know the clock is ticking. So I do a quick reach out via text or call and ask if they still need the memorial programs? I get one of two answers. They either say yes and thanks for following up because they forgot or no because someone else in the family said they’re going to take care of it.
When that happens I let them know to make sure they follow up with them because there have been many times I’ve heard that and the person either drops the ball or does something they don’t like and they’re scrambling at the last minute to get something done. Therefore make sure that you follow up with anyone who says they’re going to handle a task for you. A simple text, “how’s that coming along?” or “where are you at with X?” is fine. You can even set yourself a reminder on your phone since you may forget to follow up. That way your bases are covered. By the way if anyone gets upset that you’re following up; first of all they shouldn’t. You only get one chance to lay your loved one rest and you want to get it right. Anyone helping should understand that and be accommodating to your requests.
We all know keepsakes are crucial to funeral services. While many come to give their condolences and support the family, they’re grieving in their own way as well and need something to help them commemorate the loved one being laid to rest. Thus, providing keepsakes for them is very important and if you don’t, it will be embarrassing for the family and lead to questions that really don’t need to be raised. There are several factors that determine what funeral keepsakes are created for the service though.
Attendance
Are you going to have a small, medium or large service? Perhaps if they’ve lived a long life many who would’ve normally attended may have already passed away. Thus, the service will be more of an intimate affair. That’s usually a small funeral service of 100 people or less. If you anticipate more than 100 people then that would be a medium sized service of 150-300 attendees. If your loved one was well known in the community or held a high position then you’re looking at a large service of 300-500 attendees or more. I’ve printed 500 to even 1000 memorial programs for loved ones who were pastors, officers and firemen, or simply young ones who were very popular. Regardless of the keepsakes you’re leaning toward we must discuss the elephant in the room.
Your budget is not reflective of your love
The reality is that the keepsakes you chose will be dependent on your budget. If the funeral is being taken care of by family members pooling their funds your options may be limited. You may also run into issues since the ones who put in the most want to have the strongest say. What to do in those situations is a blog post for another day. The best way to take price off the table and be able to focus on having a service that honors their legacy the best is for your loved one to have a life insurance policy. Nonetheless, let’s get one thing clear; never feel ashamed if you’re unable to get certain things for your funeral service you may want due to budget. Love doesn’t have a price tag and how much you spend on the funeral is never and will never be indicative of how much you cared for your loved one.
Keeping that in mind, if you’re going to have a large service, certain keepsakes would be off the table due to price and purpose. Yet there are two keepsakes that I feel are a must for every funeral service no matter your faith.
Required keepsakes for every memorial service
Two keepsakes that I feel are a must for every funeral service are prayer cards and memorial programs. Now you don’t have to have both unless you have a wake/viewing one day and the service the next. This is because those attend the wake may or may not attend the service the next day. However, everyone who attends either event wants something to take with them that commemorates the loved one. Thus in that situation you have to have both of those keepsakes. If you’re only doing one service you have to freedom to choose either one. I find many Catholics will opt for prayer cards and may add the mass program depending on their preferences. This is because a catholic mass funeral is very specific and doesn’t change. There’s not many places for reflections, solos and so forth so names don’t need to be in a mass program. Other faiths I find will almost always have a program because many are involved in the service and treat it more of a celebration rather than tradition. As a result more emphasis is placed on the funeral program because it will have more of the life story shown in a full obituary and many pictures to show a full life lived. When it comes to programs you have a few types.
Memorial program types
Standard Bi-Fold Program–This is an 8.5×11 program folded in half to make it four pages in total. These are good for simple services and when you’re not going to have a lot of pictures. The advantage with it is that you can print more if you’re having a large service and not worry too much about budget. A few of my favorite designs for standard programs are the Blissful, Celtic and Classic Collections. I actually designed them with simple services in mind so that I can place emphasis on the life story and use ornaments to round out the design without overshadowing the loved one.
Legal Programs–These are legal sized 8.5×14 formatted as either a bifold or trifold format. The trifold format give us the ability to hold more pictures (up to 20) without having to charge extra for it. I find a lot of personalization happens with this size and the large 11×17 sizes since families want to have a lot of pictures on display. The Design Collections I like in the legal program size are the Decadent, Empress, Sublime and Prestige Collections. These have elegant backgrounds and frames and allow me flexibility in either having the loved one in a frame of not. I personally prefer loved ones not in a frame because then they’re really the center of attention as they should be.
Large 11×17 Programs–This size also comes either as a bifold or trifold format with the trifold holding more photos (up to 40). Truth be told I actually love creating 11×17 trifolds the best because me and my team can get really creative with the design and layout because families often will include poems, scriptures and lots of pictures. You can really create an amazing celebration of life with this size. Many families will also make 8-12 page programs in the bifold format. They do take a long time to put together though. This is because we’re pouring our hearts into the design being judicious with the hierarchy of photos, legibility and flow. My absolute favorite in Design Collection for this size is the Dashing Collection. I originally created it to be a masculine design, but it became so popular with families that their personalization requests led me to expand the collection to have numerous variations. I think with this format is where we get the most emotional responses and solidifies why we started Cherished Keepsakes in the first place. Families are moved to tears because we’ve captured the essence of their loved one. That’s been the goal from the start. To create designs that capture the essence and legacy of loved ones in a classy way.
While programs and prayer cards are the primary keepsakes needed for a service there are many others you can choose from. Which ones are dependent on use, personal preference and culture.
Other memorial keepsakes
Prayer Cards–As I mentioned before I feel either these or programs are a must for every funeral service. What I like about prayer cards is that we laminate them, so no one is tossing them or leaving them behind in chairs after the service. Because they’re laminated it sends a subliminal message that this is important and as a result people take it with them. Plus they’re small enough to put in a pocket or store with other prayer cards they’ve gotten from previous services. They do look at them from time to time to remember the good times shared. I love the Decadent and Celtic collections of our prayer cards.
Memorial Buttons/Pins–Round buttons that many families love to have. Many young ones prefer them as well as ethnic cultures. Since the space is small, ours are 2.25 inches, we try to save the largest space for the picture of the loved one. My favorite Design Collections are the Larger than Life and the Baroque collections (Baroque collection is only available to funeral homes enrolled in our RAP program). Buttons are definitely more personal so they should be reserved for close friends and family.
Memorial Portraits-The portrait is a great complimentary keepsake to have on display at the service. You can have a large portrait next to the casket, a smaller one next to the sign in book or a digital one to keep on your mobile phone. I like the mobile portrait since that can be forwarded to everyone who’d like to keep a keepsake with them at all times. With this keepsake the Dashing Collection is my favorite.
Bookmarks–Just like it sounds many choose this for the avid readers and religious ones since they’ll place it in their Bible. With it you can either do a 1-sided or 2-sided format. Like buttons I’d reserve these for close friends and family.
Acknowledgement/Thank You Cards–A way to say thanks to those who attended the service. I also like them because it provides another keepsake for those who attended and won’t be tossed. With thank you cards you don’t need to have a whole bunch since you’re sending them to households rather than individuals.
Service Announcements–In our digital age I’m finding these are rising in use because many will put them on their social media page to let people know when and where the service will be held with a link to view the streamed service. We make our service announcements play double duty through its size. This way they can be put on display on social media as well as on monitors at the memorial service. Classes up the service a little more.
Hard Cover Register/Sign-In Books–This is a new keepsake for us at the time of this post. Many make them general yet we’ve leveled ours up by making our sign in book personalized like all the other keepsakes. As it’s new, I can’t say I have a preference in Design Collection, but love that we’ve created an affordable option since others charge $150-$200 for hard cover register books.
Many options but it’s still a personal choice
Choosing keepsakes can be a lot especially when you factor in the content and images you need to gather for it. However, keep in mind its purpose is to honor their legacy and bring you solace. Pick keepsakes that do that best for you and you won’t go wrong.
